Lets look at some mother fucking flowers...

Bam -- Some f'ing orchids to start off with -- ladies tresses. They smell purdy. Like jasmine and vanilla.

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How bout some Jacobs Ladder? Pretty yes?
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Spurred Gentian. Its Gentian and its got some goddamn spurs for flowers. Thats fucking cool.
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Thats a fucking tree stump. It used to be a tree. Now its not.
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These arent flowers. These are butterflies. They are bitchen. If this is a revelation to you you need to re-evaluate your life.
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Done. Pictures pictures pictures..
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Because i'm fucking hungry

Mother fucking food.

Its fucking food and i fucking make it and put it in my fucking mouth. Fuck yeah.

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Its a mother fucking avocado. I use it to make some fucking guacamole. With garlic and tomatoes and onions and shit. Why?

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So i can eat mother fucking scallops with it. And some reduced balsamic lime vinegarette to dip that shit in. And some mushroom bacon couscous on the side. Did i forget the broccoli? No mother fucker i did not. I cooked that shit with garlic and steamed it with boiling motherfucking goddamn soy sauce. Fuck yeah.
BTW -- Time to cook? 1/2 hour. Bitches be thinking i spend all day cooking. FUCK THAT.

.Broccoli and cheese chicken. With mushrooms and potatoes. Because why the fuck not? Its fucking steamy because i just took the lid off.

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Bitches dont even know. Steak with mother fucking  goddamn fucking eggs. And potatoes with jalepenos and bacon and sour cream. And some couscous because as i said -- bitches dont even know.

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Fucking cedar wrapped roasted veggies. I marinated those motherbitchfuckers and roasted them inside a sheet of wet wood with some fucking feta cheese. And then i seared the fuck out of some fucking cabbage and ate it with goddamn caraway seed. The thing in the middle? FISH MOTHER FUCKER. Baked that SOB with greek seasoning i made mixed up with mayo to MAKE IT STICK LIKE A FUCKING MURDER CHARGE ON A MINORITY.

Now i have to go. And figure out what the fuck to make myself for fucking supper tonight.
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Time for some pics...

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I stuck a camera togethers out of paper. I will eventually take photos with it when i find my film...

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My pile of wood. I broke my axe handle so no more chopping for a bit.... Too bad it was good exercise.
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Thats home... Allot of tower workers  keep asking for sidewalk blocks to replace the broken ones... I think thats retarded. Its not like a cracked sidewalk block works any worse. They weigh 100 pounds a peice and the government has to helicopter them out. How fucking expensive is that? (i donthave any broke it just pisses me off that my tax dollars go to flying sidewalk blocks around north alberta yet they wont provide me with some fertilizer or soil for the lawn.) Its silly. I get the sidewalk blocks to make paths where you walk every day but unless they are rotten to hell just freaking leave them in.

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Solsitce sunset. Pretty.
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twin flower. It smells incredible but it only smells in the evening. When mosquitos try to kill me. (they are trying to kill me i swear. They would leave a dry husk if i stayed outside long enough)
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bunch berry and blueberry..
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K i'm done now -- transferring pics over from facebook makes me grumpy and angry. Its rainy as fuck here and i dont feel like putzing around trying to make blogger work the way it should. Sometimes i think if i ever find the pricks responsible for testing and approving the final design of the site i would kick them in the balls untill they died. I'ma gonna go eat my yoghurt with chia and granola and banana and make some coffee in my aeropress.

Fuck the mosquito.
Fuck the mosquito.
Fuck the mosquito.

rambleing a bit and some pics...

grumble grumble grumble mornings grumble.

Visitors yesterday -- it was nice to see Mike and Caitlyn -- very nice people i must say -- they ate some of my bread and seemed to like it... Not sure whether they were just humoring me or not... I think it turned out pretty good... No picks as most of its picked at now... I could pass along instructions for it though --

Here goes:
The night before --
A big dollop of starter. What? You dont have sourdough starter? I dont care -- just use a big pour of it...
3 cups of water. Dont measure with a cup pour that shit into a drinking bottle and eyeball it.
SALT -- just chuck a bunch in. Stir.
5is cups of flour. Again it could be anywhere from 4 to 6 cups but dont worry about measuring. Measurung is for pussies. Ever see the Urban Peasant measure shit? No he just fucking went for it. Like a boss.
Maybe add a dash of chia seeds too -- seeds seem to have a nice leveling effect opn the moisture content.
Glop that shit around. dont knead it. Kneading is what cats do when they are happy. Your not a cat. Cats dont eat bread. What the hell is wrong with you?
Cover that ugly fucking bowl with a wet fucking cloth and leave it alone all fucking night.

In the morning -- grab a bit of flour and turn that shit out. Scatter some flour on top and oin your hands and fucking get that dough out of the bowl. You should be albe to hold the goo in your hands without it sticking but if you cant WHO THE FUCK CARES MOVE ON. Stick it in a oiled bowl so its easy to get out later and then just leave it. Go relax. After awhile -- (depending on how warm your kitchen is) pour it into a roasting pan and slash the top with a knife and then cover it. Stick it in the oven with a cookie sheet underneath and fill sheet with water. Now turn the oven on. How hot? I have no idea. Higher than 350 and lower than 500. This is bread we are making -- its not rocket science -- people have made it for TEN THOUSAND YEARS. If you cant half ass your way to a decent loaf then you are trying to hard. So put it in the oven and turn the oven on -- not the other way around. Lets the bread prood extra in the pan. Take the cover off 45-50 miniutes into the cooking so the crust browns up. Total cooking time is from 1 to 1.5 hours. Spread first crusty slice with butter, jam, or nutella...

So -- thats my bread recipie -- no kneading -- no spreading flour all over the place... The worst thing thats going to happen is your going to have two dirty bowls and crappy bread. Feed it to your dog.

So -- something more interesting now...

Basa fish with italian seasoning and cabbage and potatoes... Fresh chives... Living gooooood.

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Chicken salad with avocado and crackers and cheese.... the chicken came from
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A roasted butterflied chicken -- with roasted root veggies and pan gravy.... Eating mad food is good for the moral. Plus eating out of cans gets tired fast -- i like to cook -- sorry if anyone finds food pics grating but its one of my big pleasures out here...

Where??? Here:
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Thats my home... I think my next post will tell more about that and whats around...
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Bunny -- He sure makes allot of noise banging around under my cabin. And skeeters. To many. They eat me. They eat and eat and eat. The little skin i have left after scratching is a bumpy itchy raw mess.
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See the smoke? Well its not smoke -- its a spook. Moisture rises out of the forest after a rain storm and the tiny fog patches are almost indistinguishable from smoke. You gotta watch them (or not worry so much since it just rained like mad over that area and spooks are to be expected)
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I dug my helipad sign out abit with a pulaski -- skeeters loved me for it.
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I finally have flowers in that bed i built...
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Yeah -- Thats about it. Its nice to have some sun to brown my pasty white flesh...

Cold -- chilly and wet weather..

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Sorry Ladies -- I'm taken. This guy has a sweetie-pie already. I say this because I realize I must be one hell of a catch…
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I'mean -- I'm incredibly dashing, funny, charming like nobody else, more humble than the Dali Lama and more endowed than a horse…  I can cook too…
It was rainy and gusty and drab out -- so I make the hot and spicy. Hot and spicy food for a hot and spicy Michael…

I had wandered the cabin looking at food to make when I realized my hot thai peppers were growing mold. GASP! So after breaking down to weep and cry I cleaned myself up and decided to do something about it --

I set the three best peppers aside and cleaned the mold and crud off of my poor tasty veggies. They all got chopped up and put on my drying rack -- peppers dry ever so well…

The three remaining guys got diced into a bowl. Then an orange bell pepper got diced in with them… And then more and more and more...

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-Hot peppers -- diced

-Bell pepper diced

-an onion sautéed

-a mushroom sautéed

-some garlic because WHY THE FUCK NOT?
- Bacon diced and fried crispy
-Some cheddar cheese
-cream cheese
-plain yoghurt
-Coriander -- i had no cilantro...

-The juice of half a lime

MASH THAT JAZZ WITH A SPOON. Mash it hard. Blend it good. Call it dirty names then apologize and tell it you love it and you didn’t mean it.

Paste a spoon of it onto:
-Jalepenos -- tops and bottoms trimmed and sliced into three rectangles each -- insides cleaned.

Then bread that -- I used corn flakes and stale crackers…

Measuring quantities is for pussies. Your making food not meth -- eyeball it and put your own spin on it...

Cook the fuck out of those.
Consume with a nice cold beer.

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End note --This last pic was taken at 11:45PM -- on a cloudy night -- its still bright out enough to go for a stroll...

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